Female Transition & Detransition Timeline
I took testosterone at 15, loved it—until I didn’t. Hair loss, beard, and the sinking feeling I’d ruined my body made me stop. Detransition saved me; no kid should gamble irreversible changes on temporary pain.
نظرة عامة
Elle recounts her journey from a happy, feminine childhood through severe teen distress, transition at 15 on testosterone, and detransition at 19 after realizing the changes clashed with her identity. She shares photos and emotions from each phase, ending proud of choosing herself over medical transition.
ملخص الفيديو الكامل
Elle opens the video by explaining that viewers have repeatedly asked for a timeline of her transition and detransition, and she finally feels ready to share it. She begins with her early childhood, describing herself as a “really happy kid” who loved wearing “crazy cute” dresses and skirts and who spent her time trying to please her mother and sister. These idyllic years ended around age ten, when puberty began and her mental health deteriorated. Between twelve and fifteen she became “edgy,” cut her hair short, and developed depression, anxiety, and an eating disorder. School became impossible, friendships evaporated, and she “really didn’t see any good in myself at all.” At fifteen Elle came out as transgender, adopted a masculine presentation—buzz cut, flannels, button-downs—and set her sights on testosterone because she “hated” her voice more than anything else. For the first seven months on hormones she took a selfie every shot day, treating the process like an exciting experiment. The novelty soon wore off; she stopped documenting changes and began to feel that weekly injections were “just my life now.” Still, she says she felt “good about myself” for roughly the next two years, during which she graduated high school, worked several jobs, canvassed for the Democrats, and got a girlfriend. By early 2019, however, stress mounted—college applications, hair loss, and a pervasive sense of unease. The turning point came in spring 2019. At a “gay prom” in April Elle wore a bra in public for the first time in four years and felt acutely embarrassed, convinced everyone saw her as “a man in a bra.” That experience triggered renewed questioning. During a three-week road trip in June—her “last great excursion as Luke”—she fantasized about wearing a bikini but was deterred by the testosterone-induced body hair and beard. In August 2019 she stopped taking testosterone altogether. A rapid montage of photos from September through February shows the months since: Elle growing her hair, gradually softening her appearance, and visibly relaxing into her reclaimed identity. Elle closes by reflecting on the day she chose to detransition. She recalls thinking, “I don’t know if I’ll ever look like a woman again… but I know that I need to do this for myself, not for anyone else.” She emphasizes that the decision was made for her own well-being, not to satisfy “society, men, transphobes or trans people,” and says she is “very proud of the person I am now.”